Can I Ask You A Question? is a book of meaningful questions designed to deepen your relationship with anyone — friends, family, your significant other, even complete strangers.
A great way to get the conversation going-- with old friends or new
I brought this book to Books and Brews-- a discuss-whatever-you're-reading book club at our local brewery. We actually had to put it down and let someone else discuss their book because the random question I used as a demonstration got us into a long conversation. A week later, someone asked me if I had the book with me during a birthday celebration at the same brewery. 3 questions started hours of conversation that went from serious, to teary, to laughing loud enough to get dirty looks from other customers! It was a great time and I felt like I got to know good friends on a deeper level. I bought an extra copy to leave there and another for my daughter to take to college and break the ice during her freshman year.
I love this gem of a book and I’ve been giving it as gifts — to friends and family of all ages —ever since I heard about it on the podcast. Thank you Ms Levitt for this bright offering during these dark times.
My husband is suspicious of anything psychology-related, but we've had some excellent conversations around questions in the book. We both learned things we didn't know about each other and had fun doing it!
This book revived my relationship with my relative, with whom I’d lost touch for many years. She’s very ill now, and when I first went to visit it was hard to find things to talk about, but not anymore. I feel as though I’m helping her with these interesting and fun topics. So thank you for giving me a way to feel useful in a situation where it’s easy to feel useless.
I really like the concept for this book. I've struggled with casual conversations my entire life. Once a conversation partner and I find a topic of mutual interest, I can usually talk for a long time. Even other people who are great conversationalists are easy to talk to, they know how to start a conversation and carry it, too. It's those people who are generally quiet, like me, and seem to have the same issue I have where it's uncomfortable to be with.
The first chapter seems like it would good to use on a first date and so many of the questions seem geared towards a close, personal relationship. A lot of questions are not suitable for the people I meet, in business, for example. Could you take what you've learned writing this book and expand it to use in a more formal, business relationship?
For Thanksgiving, I put some of my favorite questions on pieces of paper and put them in a bowl. The ages at the table were 9-72. Everybody enjoyed answering the questions. The kids wanted more. It started a discussion at the table and everybody participated. It was a big hit. I liked that the kids were talking about more than saying school and soccer were good. I was a little unsure how people were going to respond but I have to tell you it was so nice to have conversations that were new and interesting. I will be doing it again next year.
Asking questions has always been my weakness since I was young. It has got to a point where I realize that my inability to ask good questions has hindered my intelligent growth and the ability to understand the world. I love how this tiny book has helped me tackle my weakness in a humble and funny way. It also motivates actions as I have used it to ask questions to my wife. Simply stunning!
I was with a group of people with whom I've spent a few days talking small talk or shallow talk (one level deeper). Even talking about my non-monogamous relationships didn't bring the conversation to another level.
When we were at dinner one time I brought out the "if your life was a story, what would be the plot twist" question and that brought out some deep deep things like a sister with mental health issues, importance of work, insecurities... Really interesting aspects of people. Each answer lead to some discussions and compassion and kindness and the whole thing lasted the rest of dinner.. Just 1 question.
Amanda spoke to our school, Temple Grandin School, recently. She asked the question, if you could only have one holiday or could invent a new one, what would it be? Later, there was a discussion about a holiday for Stanislas Petrov and how he should be celebrated for saving humanity from a nuclear holocaust. Today we are celebrating a day in his honor at Temple Grandin School! Amanda was great and her book will be used in the future extensively at the school!
This is a fun little book. My partner and I have used it to get to know each other better. The questions are not something you'd normally think to ask someone which can take conversations even with someone you've known a long time down some interesting unexplored paths. Some of the questions are geared toward an audience that lives more intimately with their phones and social media than, let's say, those of us of a certain age LOL. That's not a complaint just an observation. It's worth the buy.
This book is so cute. I love that it's pocket sized and the tiny bookmark is so clever! It would make an excellent wedding gift (or paper anniversary gift!) I'm loving it as a conversation starters with my partner of 5 years - many of the questions bring up things we hadn't talked about yet!
